After 38 years, Lionel and Jean finally get to Paris. Jean looks out the hotel window and observes "Il pleut," which is French for "it's raining." She's disappointed because she wants to walk and walk and walk. Lionel is tired -- he's still in bed and that sounds to him like a couple of walks too many. Jean reminds him that they planned the day while they were on the plane. Lionel doesn't feel that one should put too much stock in plans made at high altitude. He suggests they go to the pictures instead, but Jean didn't come all the way to Paris to go to the pictures. No, this trip was planned 38 years ago -- what was the first thing we were going to do, Lionel? she wanted to know. His answer? I don't know, but it didn't have anything to do with walking.

While Jean searches through the closet for something to wear, Lionel gets out of bed and kisses her good morning. There's a knock on the door. He leaps back in bed, safely under the covers. Jean is surprised by his shyness. "It could be anyone," he explains. "If it's President Mitterrand are you at home?" she asks.

The chambermaid enters with their breakfast. She doesn't speak English and Lionel tries to speak with her in French. She asks him how he slept and he tells her he slept "comme un arbre" (which means "like a tree"). Jean points out his error. He explains that was the closest he could get to "log." He tries it again: "comme un log." This time he moves his hand in a sawing motion. She looks like she gets it, but what happens is she brings him a knife. "There," she says, proud of her understanding. He tries to make it clearer, but Jean cuts him off by thanking the woman and telling her she's been very nice and very patient. As she leaves Lionel observes she doesn't speak very good English, does she?" Jean sits on the edge of the bed and Lionel remains under the covers as they share a breakfast.

JEAN: I feel a little dissolute. You know, Paris, crumbs in the bed and a lover.
LIONEL: Aren't I a bit old to be described as a lover?
JEAN: No, not unless you have an incredibly short memory.

They return to the hotel lobby after the walk. Jean tells him not to overdo the limp. He's not overdoing anything -- his feet hurt, he says. Lionel walks off and Jean feels free to moan. Apparently her own feet are bothering her, but she neglected to mention that to him. She puts her hand up against the wall to balance herself and steps out of one shoe. She turns towards the couch where a young woman is sitting. Their eyes meet. The girl bursts into tears. Jean approaches her and offers a tissue. The girl explains that she's on her honeymoon. She and her husband had a row that morning and he left. She doesn't even know if he'll be coming back. Lionel walks up and starts talking to Jean but fails to notice that she's sitting with the young girl. Jean shushes him and motions with her head for Lionel to notice the girl. He says "oh, hello." Jean says she thinks they need a drink. Lionel finds that to be a good idea and tells the girl "it was nice to have met you." Jean clarifies the situation and tells him she meant all three of them should have a drink. The girl is afraid she'll be imposing. "Not a bit of it," are the words that come out of Lionel's mouth. But we know better.

The girl is feeling so badly because everything is going all wrong. She and her husband Terry were only going to be there for four days and now it's all over before it started. Jean tells her it will be okay and that every couple has spats. "Do you?" the girl wants to know. Oh yes - "don't we Lionel?" Lionel has been busy reading and he isn't paying any attention. She asks him again. "All the time -- hardly a day goes by." Jean gives him a stare. He goes into a bit more detail than she would prefer. They had three just this morning, he says. They start to have a spat right then. The girl apologizes for upsetting them. Jean says, no, they were actually laughing about it, weren't they Lionel? Lionel says "more or less." Jean tells the girl that her husband will probably come walking through the door any minute. The girl says that Jean doesn't know him: he sulks. Jean says that lots of men do and glances quickly at Lionel. Some men, she says, are very frightened by words. They ought to talk more, they really should, they both agree. Lionel says that's assuming they can get a word in edgewise. He excuses himself, saying he has a couple of phone calls to make. The girl thinks that he's upset, that Jean should go after him, but Jean assures her that it is not so. The girl again bursts into tears. Jean asks what the row was about. "He made what I considered to be an unreasonable demand in the middle of the night." She says, much to Jean's relief, that she really doesn't want to say any more about it.

Jean returns to the room to find Lionel sitting on the edge of the bed, soaking his feet. She asks what he's doing and he says he's treading grapes. She wants to know if he'll be doing that a lot -- she thinks it's a bit "elderly." She wants to know where he got the bowl. From the chambermaid. She tells him "we're going to lunch." He seems somewhat offended that she doesn't bother to ask and merely informs him. He has misunderstood: she's not going to lunch with him, she's going with Ann, the young honeymooner. Jean says she can't leave her all alone. "What about me?" he wants to know. Jean says he's not a child and he can take care of himself, whereas poor Ann's husband has walked out on her during what was meant to be their honeymoon. He reminds her that this was meant to be their holiday. He wants to know where it ends -- do they have a second bed put into their room? She thinks he's being callous. He thinks she's taking sides without knowing all the facts. He wonders why Ann is the "poor thing" and her husband is the "idiot." Jean says that's a mild description, actually. She claims that Ann's said enough. Lionel doesn't say anything. Jean wants to know if Lionel wants to know what Ann said. He tells her to go on. She tells him that Terry made an unreasonable demand in the middle of the night. A grin cuts across Lionel's face. He wants to know what kind of demand. Jean tells him it's obvious, isn't it. "No," he responds. She's convinced that Lionel ought to know because he's a man. Lionel explains to her that one woman's idea of an unreasonable demand might be another's idea of a rather exciting suggestion. In the end, he says, it's for them to make their own definitions. She says she's going to go to a bistro they passed during their walk and will be back after lunch. He wants to know if they're doing anything after lunch. She says it's hard to tell. He's resigned and tells her she'll either find him in the bar or else he'll be doing something elderly like taking a nap. She's hoping he won't sulk. She tells him she'll see him later. "Eventually," he say. She leaves, somewhat in a huff.

Lionel's in the hotel bar, pondering a French bread. He has no idea how to eat it. A man at a nearby table waves his bread at Lionel in a sort of salute. Lionel waves his bread back at the patron. He breaks off a piece of bread and eats it. A young man walks into the bar and orders a beer. He and Lionel are the only ones actually seated at the bar and he asks Lionel if the bread is good. Lionel tells him he was pretty sure that it is if you can figure out a way to get in. He's gone off the idea, he says, and offers the bread to the young man, who refuses. Lionel wonders how the man knew he was English. It was something about the way he was looking at the bread. The young man asks if Lionel is in Paris with his wife. Lionel stumbles around -- no, with a friend, a girl friend, well, not a girl, but in that area. Lionel asks who the man is with and he tells him he's on his honeymoon -- well he was. "You're Terry," Lionel says and tells the puzzled man that he and Jean were talking with Ann that morning. He tells Terry that Ann and Jean are having lunch. Terry doesn't understand why Lionel is even talking to him -- after all, he's some sort of monster, a beast. Lionel says that Ann didn't call him that. He wants to know what she did call him. "Terry," he says.

Terry tells Lionel that he doesn't think it's right to have such intimate things being talked about with perfect strangers. Lionel agrees. Plus, they've only heard half the story. Which, Lionel tells him, he never wanted to hear in the first place. Terry tells him it's all so stupid anyway -- they were lying in bed and all he said was.... Lionel doesn't let him finish. He tells him to please stop it - he really doesn't want to know about it. Lionel says Terry should speak with his wife. They're not far, only 20 minutes away. He says he's not chasing after her. He offers to buy Lionel a beer and Lionel accepts.

Jean and Ann return to the hotel. Ann asks Jean to come in with her, but Jean says that she's the last person Terry would want to see. Ann wants to know what to say. Jean says it is for Terry to say something. Ann says she can't hear anything inside. Jean says he must be there because he's not in the bar and the concierge said he'd come back. Jean advises her not to apologize and turns to go. Ann opens the door and says his name. As Jean walks away she hears Ann start to cry again. Terry isn't there and Ann thinks he's run off again.

Meanwhile Terry is drunk. He is being supported into Lionel's room because he can barely stand by himself. As if he needed to be told, Terry tells Lionel that he's not a drinker. Terry says he can't go in the room because if Ann comes back and finds him there she'll go on about his uncle, who presumably has a drinking problem. Lionel tells him it isn't his room -- it's our room. Terry looks surprised and smiles. No, Jean's and mine, he says. Terry fears she'll hate him on sight. Lionel admits that that is quite probable, but that Jean is not there at the moment. He sits Terry upright on the edge of the bed and bends down to pull the boy's feet up. Terry puts his arms around Lionel and hugs him and tells him he wishes Lionel were his father. "Yes, it's a pity, that," says Lionel and he gets the boy to lie down. He takes Terry's shoes off and tells him to get some sleep. Even though Terry says he can't sleep, he's out like a light almost as soon as he says it. Lionel's exhausted. He takes off his jacket, sits down in his chair, pulls off his shoes and puts his feet up on the bed. He tries to stretch out, but can't -- he starts to sink between the bed and the chair. Finally he gets into bed beside Terry and says "Daddy's coming to bed."

Jean walks into the darkened room. She hears snoring and turns on the light, surprised to find Lionel in bed with a young man. Her coming in awakened Lionel. "Would you care to introduce me to your friend?" "This is Terry," he reports. Terry rolls over and puts his arm around Lionel. Lionel Jean that he met Terry in the bar and that Terry wouldn't stop talking. He says he didn't have anything else to do so he brought him up to his room. Jean accuses Lionel of getting blind drunk with him. Lionel says he didn't get drunk. Why did he bring Terry to his room? Lionel says Terry didn't want Ann to see him this way. Where is Terry's silly wife anyway? She's in her room, says Jean, who spent the entire afternoon consoling her -- and Terry's the "silly" one. Lionel defends him, saying he's a rather sensitive lad. They begin to argue over who was right and who was wrong. Jean says she's going to take a bath. He tells her she can't take a bath with Terry there, but she says she doesn't intend to take him in there with her. Lionel tells her he doesn't want her skipping about wearing a towel. Jean tells Lionel that Terry is his drinking buddy and he should sort everything out. Lionel gets angry and leaves. Jean doesn't know what to do. She walks over and tries to wake Terry, who calls her Ann. "You should be so lucky," she tells She screams in his ear and wakes him up. She tells him she's Jean, Lionel's friend.

Lionel walks in with a dolly and a porter in hot pursuit. The man tells Lionel not to take it, but Lionel is determined. He wants to know how to say "borrow a trolley" in French, but gives up and forces the man to wait outside. You told me to take care of it, he tells Jean. He wants Terry to get up on the dolly so he can wheel him back to his room. Terry sits up in bed and says he doesn't feel well. Jean pushes him back down and tells him to shut up. She says he can't go back to his wife looking like that. The porter keeps knocking on the door. Lionel shouts "attendez-la, will you?" He says he doesn't care what Terry looks like, he doesn't care if he apologizes, he doesn't care what happens, he doesn't care if he throws Ann out the window -- it isn't their business. They continue to argue. The man refuses to stop knocking on the door. Lionel finally opens it and tells the porter that he's finished using the dolly and returns it. "My God, they're an hysterical crowd, aren't they?" he says. They both start tugging at Terry. Lionel wants him to go, but Jean wants him to go into the bathroom and spruce himself up a bit while Lionel gets coffee. Jean gets a clean shirt of Lionel's from the dresser, knocks on the bathroom door and gives it to Terry.

There is a knock on the door. It's Ann. She's come to say goodbye. She thinks the concierge was mistaken about Terry's having returned to the hotel. Jean assures her that Terry is in the hotel just as Terry comes out of the bathroom with the unbuttoned shirt that she has just given him. Ann looks at him "Terry?" she sort of shrieks. "Ann, I was just sprucing myself up." Ann whines "How could you?" Jean tells her she couldn't -- don't be absurd. Terry tries to explain -- "Jean just came in and found me in bed with Lionel." Jean tells her there's an explanation, but she's suddenly very, very tired. She walks off.

Jean makes her way to the hotel bar where Lionel is standing. She wants to know how long it takes to order coffee. Lionel wants to bring the coffee upstairs, but Jean tells them they can't go up because Terry and Ann are in their room. She left them there, glaring at one another and they're sorting it all out. They figure they deserve the coffee for themselves, never mind sobering Terry, and want to bring the tray to a table, but the bartender won't let them have it. They move towards the table, but the bartender moves the other way because he thought the coffee was for the room. Lionel and Jean sit at the table and Lionel points at it, saying "ici, ici" (meaning, put it here.) Jean asks the man to please put it down. In English he says "okay, okay", but he walks away muttering in French. Lionel says he hopes they don't wreck the room. She says maybe they should .... He won't let her finish. Jean says that could have been them 38 years ago. He says they would have been having a dirty weekend. Jean says they're having one now. By the way, Lionel says, Terry told him all about the unreasonable demand. He smiles. She wants to know if he is or isn't going to tell her. He warns her that it's pretty raunchy. Seems Terry asked Ann to get up to open the window. She had just gotten comfortable and felt he should have done it himself. She was really upset that he didn't say "please" and felt that she didn't want to start married life by being ordered about. Jean calls them a pair of twits.

Lionel looks up and tells Jean "Here come Mr. and Mrs. Twit. Ann and Terry walk up to their table arm in arm and thank Lionel and Jean for getting them back together. "Lots of people wouldn't have bothered, " they say. "No," says Lionel. They're sorry for being such trouble and want to take them out for dinner that evening. Jean says that's so sweet and starts to accept the invitation, but Lionel tells them they've already made plans. They thank them again and say maybe they'll have a drink sometime. Ann and Terry leave. Lionel says that Terry concealed his relief admirably. Jean thinks the "other arrangements" excuse was a bit pat. Lionel says he actually has made other plans. He reminds her of the phone calls he made earlier. She tells him she thought he was just making an excuse to get out of the firing line. He's mock-offended, saying "you're talking to a man who stood up to a very vicious mule in Korea." They are going to a fancy restaurant overlooking a flood-lit Notre Dame and they are travelling by horse-drawn carriage. Jean says it sounds lovely and very seductive. He tells her they should go up to the room to get ready. She looks at him, hesitates, and says "later, will you be making any unreasonable demands?" He says probably not, they'll open the window before they go to bed.