Lionel is sitting on the living room couch struggling to open a jar of pickled onions. Jean casually walks in, ready to turn in for the night and tells him she's off to bed. She's about to leave but notices that he put the jar behind him as soon as she surprised him by walking in. She asks what he just hid, but instead of telling her the truth he lies and says that it was nothing. She tells him that she saw him and demands that he give her the jar. If he can't open it, he's sure she won't be able to. She assures him that she's not trying to open it -- all she wants to do is to take it away from him. She does not want this can to rule their lives. He accuses her of exaggerating. They held supper for half an hour while he struggled with it and now the moment her back is turned here he is, at it again. Never mind what she says, she does try to open it -- and fails. He looks satisfied and she tells him that she knows he's glad she couldn't open it. He says that he might be considered old-fashioned, but men are supposed to get the tight lids off jars. Simple -- women look to men, say they can't open it, men open the jars. "Except you can't." He looks wounded. She suggests that it may be a faulty lid. He sees right through that. She's going to bed, she says, and she's taking the jar out to the kitchen. She warns him that if she hears a cupboard door being opened "you and I are going to have words."
Sandy is walking alone down a dark street. 
She senses that someone is following her. She speeds up. She stops. She hears the footsteps behind her stop. She's nearly home. She speeds up again and takes out her key as she approaches the house. She walks up the stairs to the front door, puts the key in the lock and takes a look behind her before she opens the door. There appears to be a man walking in the shadows. She opens the door quickly, goes inside and leans against the door obviously feeling a sense of relief. Lionel is just shutting out the lights and hears her come inside. She rushes up to him to tell him that someone's followed her home again. Lionel moves quickly towards the front door and goes outside to see what can be seen. 
Sandy tells him not to go. She stands at the front door ringing the doorbell to attract attention. The noise attracts Jean who rushes to the front door and tells Lionel to come back into the house immediately. He walks back up the stairs and tells them that there doesn't appear to be anyone around. He says he'll put the kettle on and everyone goes back inside.
Lionel is looking out the bedroom window. Jean comes into the room and he asks her if Sandy is all right. She's a bit shaken, Jean tells him, but she'll be fine. She wonders if Lionel is thinking of tearing out again. "In my pajamas?" She thinks that would be even sillier. 
He doesn't understand what she means by even sillier. Even sillier than tearing out in the first place, she says. He wonders if he was supposed to be cowering behind the front door...or maybe he should have called for her and sent her out. She thinks he's getting silly now. She just thinks that he should have acted more responsibly. He feels he did. Sandy was being followed and he felt responsible for her safety. In fact, he feels responsible for everyone in the house. She melts and tells him that's sweet. He tells her that it isn't sweet -- it's right. She reminds them that they spent 38 years apart and she doesn't want to lose him now that she's got him. She doesn't want to find his body in a ditch. He says there are no ditches in Holland Park, but she revises the location to "gutter." He's missing the point. The man might have been armed. He doesn't think that's very likely. It's a possibility, she says. This leads him to a string of things that are not likely, but are possible -- such as his being knocked down by a rogue pheasant. It is also a possibility that he could have gotten his hands on the man. Jean says "he could have been young." He has the same look on his face as he did when she gave him the business about the pickled onions earlier that evening. She apologizes, but tells him that they must face facts -- he is not a young man anymore. He's not old. He's just not young. He thinks she's made her point. He turns off the light. She does the same.
Sandy's having breakfast. Judith walks into the kitchen and asks how she's feeling. Sandy tells her that she feels a little bit foolish -- as though perhaps she overreacted. Judith tries to convince her that she didn't. If the man wasn't following her, how come he stopped every time she stopped? Sandy wishes she had taken more karate lessons. Judith wonders about the grownups -- where are they? Seems they're having a row about something, but Sandy doesn't know what about. Jean said she was going shopping, went out and slammed the door. Shortly afterwards, Lionel said he was going for a walk, went out and slammed the door. They hear the front door open and figure that one of them just slammed back in. It's Lionel. 
As he walks into the kitchen, Judith says she's going upstairs to get dressed. She takes a minute to tell him that she thought he was very brave the night before. He seems pleased by that and thanks her. As an afterthought she says it was "a bit foolhardy, though." Again, wounded. Lionel's left alone with Sandy and he says that she probably doesn't think he should have gone out of the house at all the night before. She tries to avoid answering, noting that it was very brave of him to do so, but he presses her and she admits that no, she didn't want him to go out -- not at his age. He thinks he'll go for another walk.
Jean feels lousy. She's sitting in the living room when Sandy and Judith walk in. They tell her that they are there to be talked to. She tells them what they already knew -- that she and Lionel had words. Not at breakfast, Sandy observes. No, it was left over from the night before. Jean didn't like his rushing out into the street, but Lionel feels that it is a slight to his masculinity to have her challenge his actions. He got huffy and then she got huffy. The girls admit that they raised some of the same concerns to Lionel after breakfast and then he got huffy and took a couple of walks. They hear the front door open.
Lionel walks into the living room with a bouquet of flowers, saying he thought they looked rather lonely. 
Before he can say more Jean rushes him and puts her arms around him. The flowers please her. She tells him she loves him. Sandy and Judith both say they love him. He concludes that he should go for a walk more often. Jean wonders if he's okay. He tells them that his pride is slightly dented and he just wants to say one thing -- he realizes that he may not be at his physical peek, but he's not Tweety Pie either. If it happened again, he'd do just what he did this time. Jean is about to argue with him, but Sandy says that it won't happen again. It was just some "waste of space" who had nothing better to do. Jean still wants to protest, but Judith hushes her and assures her that Sandy is right. 
Jean backs down and tells Lionel the flowers are nice. Lionel tells her that the flowers are not from him -- he found them on the doorstep. She wants to know who they're from. Sandy suggests that Jean read the card. "If you want to be conventional," Jean says, as she looks for the card. There is no card. And no-one rang the doorbell. Lionel says that obviously one of them has a secret admirer. They all look at one another and Lionel figures that maybe there is reason to worry.
Jean is in the kitchen ironing. She stares at the phone. There appears to be some tension. Lionel walks in and heads towards a cabinet from which he takes out the pickled onion jar. He says he'll run it under cold water. 
Jean tells him that it should be run under hot water, but they don't need a pickled onion just now. He turns to put it back in the cabinet, but not before giving it one last intense try. He'll make coffee then, he says. He wonders if the girls would fancy one. Jean says that they've gone out. When? Just a few moments ago, she tells him. "Why wasn't I told?" Jean says that it is broad daylight and they're together. He wants to know where they've gone. She tells him that Sandy said they were going to the market. Lionel leaves the house despite the fact that Jean tries to stop him. Jean is frustrated and walks to the phone, picks it up and punches in a number.
Sandy and Judith are enjoying themselves, walking from booth to booth at a outdoor flea market and eying the merchandise.
They are unaware of Lionel's presence because he's watching them closely, hiding around corners. When they turn in his direction, he turns away. He's watching them like a hawk. He's trying not to look conspicuous so he pretends to be interested in the things that are around him. In this spirit he picks up a bugle. The girls are on the move and Lionel follows, forgetting that he has a bugle. The trader sees Lionel walk off with it and confronts him. 
Lionel tells him that he doesn't want it and the man accuses him of trying to steal it. The man wants Lionel to pay for it. Lionel again says he doesn't want it. The man pulls out his cell phone so he can call the police. Lionel looks up and can't find the girls so he figures he'd better buy the bugle and get going or he'll lose them entirely. The man takes the money and tells Lionel that this bugle spent some time with the infantry and could probably tell a story or two. Lionel will ask it to do just that when he gets a moment.
Sandy stops Judith as they walk and says she feels as though they are being followed. 
She wonders whether or not she's hysterical, but Judith observes that being hysterical is something that Sandy is not in the habit of doing. She suggests that they count to three and both turn around at the same time. One. Two. Three. They turn just in time to see someone slip around a corner. He was too quick for them, though, and they only know that someone jumped back.
Back home the doorbell rings and Jean answers it. A man pushes his way in and frightens her, but he puts his finger to his mouth to quiet her. He closes the door, bends down and peers through the mail slot to look outside. 
Jean asks who he is and what he wants. "Big Al" sent him. Jean realizes that this is Alistair's doing. She wants to know if Alistair is with him. "Best not to know," he tells her as he stands a bit too close to her. He's got a heavy accent and wears a long dangle earring in his left ear. He's wearing a pair of jeans, a tight black t-shirt and a studded belt. She asks him to come through and heads for the kitchen, but he walks directly into the living room. She walks in behind him and asks if she could get him something to drink. He says that a cup of herbal tea would be nice. She's pleasantly surprised.
Sandy says she's had enough of this. So has Judith -- she wants to go home. Sandy tells her that she misunderstood. She's had enough of this situation -- she feels victimized, Judith feels victimized -- they are walking in a free London Market not a souk in Northern Africa and they should not be made to feel this way. "What is he anyway? Just some gutless wonder that enjoys following women about." She says they should go back the way they came and see how he likes it. Judith tells her that she's behind her. Sandy is glad of that because she wouldn't try it on her own.
Now it's Lionel who is trying to avoid being followed. He's back where he bought the bugle and the man who sold it to him says that he's not giving him his money back -- he never claimed that it worked. Lionel tells him that he doesn't want his money back. He's just trying to avoid being followed by two girls. The man seems astonished at the thought. The man sees Judith and Sandy and says he supposes it's those two. Lionel tells him that yes, as a matter of fact is is them. "You're living in a fantasy world, mate." The trader looks up, but Lionel has disappeared. The girls walk up to the man, who asks if he can help them. They say that they are looking for a weirdo. The man asks them if he was carrying a bugle. They look puzzled.
Jean and the man are in the kitchen and she's serving him a snack. She offers him another one and mistakenly calls him Neil. He corrects her. His name is Nails, as in six inch. She asks if he was actually christened Nails. 
No -- it's a nickname, but something happened. Involving six inch nails? Yes. Jean looks shocked. The doorbell rings and Nails tells her that that would be Big Al. Jean rushes to open the door. It is, of course, Alistair. Jean tells him that Nails is terrifying. That's because he's supposed to be. He reminds Jean that she called and asked him for help and "Nails is the man." It's certainly better than Old Li playing vigilante. She agrees with that. He wants to go into the kitchen so that they can have a war council.
Alistair greets Nails. Almost immediately they hear someone at the front door and Jean says that if it is Lionel they should say that Nails is the double glazing salesman. Or the vet. Alistair reminds her that they don't have animals. Doesn't matter, though -- it's Judith and Sandy who are surprised and frightened by Nails. Jean tries to explain who he is, but Nails finishes her sentence and tells them that he is their "guardian angel, courtesy of Big Al." Alistair explains that Jean called him about some nasty type who's been on the prowl. He called Nails. End of prob. 
Judith wants to know what exactly Nails is going to be doing. Nails looks menacing, cracks his knuckles and speaks slowly, "something." Judith means before he catches him. Nails says he'll be about -- "he won't see me til I see him. Then..." Jean tells Alistair that no-one wants this thing to get out of hand. Alistair tells her that Nails is a pro -- guys like the one who is following Sandy have got to be stopped because they are giving the rest of them a bad name. Sandy says that all she knows is that she doesn't want to feel like a victim anymore. Nails tells her that she's not a victim anymore -- the stalker is. He gets up and tells them he'll be about. Alistair has to leave, too.
The girls are alone now. Jean tells them it appears as though the cavalry has arrived. They wonder where Alistair gets these people. Jean thought they'd be gone much longer. They intended to be but they tell her about the person who was following them at the market. Jean wants to know why they didn't tell Nails about that, but Judith reminds her that it would have been too late to do anything about it. Did they get a good look at him? Sandy says that they tried, but really didn't get a good look. All they think they know is that he was carrying a bugle. That's eccentric, says Jean. 
Jean wonders what kind of person would be carrying a bugle and what kind of question is that to be asking on a quiet Saturday afternoon. Judith observes that "he's got into our lives." Sandy hopes that Nails is in a bad mood when he catches him. They hear the front door open and Jean tells them not to tell Lionel about Nails. Lionel walks into the kitchen and asks if anyone fancies a drink. He's carrying a bugle. He leaves for the living room and the women look at one another, stunned. Jean rushes after him.
He asks if she'd like a drink. No. Yes. No. He sees she's in one of her decisive moods. She wants to know why he followed Sandy and Judith. He wonders how she knew. She tells him that the bugle was a giveaway. He says it's obvious. He followed them in order to keep an eye on them. Jean says that he frightened them. He couldn't have because he kept his distance. If the chap showed up he'd be able to follow him following them. 
She tells him it's just as well she didn't follow him. Yes -- otherwise she'd have ended up "following me following him following them." Only there wasn't a him. Well, maybe next time, he says. Jean says there won't be a next time. He wants to know how she knows that. She looks trapped. "I have a feeling," she tells him. He pronounces it one of her less well-structured arguments. He has no idea why she thinks this will all stop now. His voice rises and she tells him not to get aggressive with her. She doesn't want his body thrown on a bric-a-brac store. He says she's doing it again -- first a ditch, then a gutter and now a bric-a-brac store. Judith walks in and wants to know what this row is about. 
She walks up to Lionel and tells him that he knows how fond everyone in the house is of him. He says he's suspicious when anyone in the house starts a sentence like that. They are, and there's no reason for him to ever put himself in any kind of danger. Jean interrupts and says that's exactly what she's been saying. So is he supposed to sit home with a rug over his knees and let Sandy turn into a nervous wreck? Jean calls Sandy and tells her to inform Lionel that she is not becoming a nervous wreck. She confirms this and anyway, everything is going to be all right now. Jean looks as though Sandy has given it away. Lionel suspects. He wants to know what's going on. He tells them that he is not a complete fool. He saw their faces when the flowers arrived. He saw how jumpy they were at the market that morning. They say that that was because they felt as though they were being followed, which they were. He goes on to say that all of a sudden they act as though everything is okay and when he asks "Why?" all he gets are three guilty looks and three half-hearted "oh nothings". "Well?" he asks, looking for the truth. Judith leaves, saying she's going to make some coffee. Sandy follows, saying she'll make some tea. This leaves Jean and Lionel alone in the living room. "What are you going to make -- a cake?" he asks.
Jean tells him that she phoned Alistair and he found them a "sort of private detective." Lionel looks pensive, and a bit wounded again. "I see," he says. The man will keep an eye on things. Lionel wonders if he's young. "-ish," Jean tells him. "And fit?" That, too, Jean says. Lionel surprises her by saying that's good. He should have thought of calling in a professional himself. He tells her not too look so stunned by this pronouncement. He is not an unreasonable man. He leaves the living room saying he intends to have a custard tart with either a cup of tea or a cup of coffee.
They're getting ready for bed and Jean is standing at the window looking out. Lionel wants to know why. Judith and Sandy are walking back from the tube station. Lionel seems frustrated. He thought it was all taken care of. "Don't worry, you said." Now here she is standing at the window still. He tells her that Alistair's private detective is out there and he'll be watching them every step of the way. If that man gets within ten feet of them the detective will nab him. "Yes, I know," she says, worriedly. Lionel doesn't know what's at the bottom of this and he just dismisses her worry and says they're in safe hands. Jean comes clean and tells him that he's not actually a private detective.
He wonders if there is such a thing as a public detective. "Nails is sort of free-lance," she supposes. Lionel does a double-take when he hears the name. She assures him that he drinks herbal tea. Lionel says "he's a gangster isn't he?" Something in that area, she thinks. Jean's really worried about what Nails might do to the man. "Supposing he has a limp ... or a lisp." Lionel doesn't begin to understand what she's talking about. She thinks he might just be someone who is very shy and who doesn't know how to talk to girls. Lionel says that all men go through that stage. Maybe this one never got past it, she thinks. She begins to speculate: the loneliness must be awful. One night he sees a girl like Sandy and he follows her. He wants to say hello, but he doesn't know how. He leaves the flowers on the doorstep. She worries -- it's so sad. Lionel doesn't believe how worked up she's getting over this fiction that she's just created. She says that if that man follows Sandy tonight Nails will nab him and the "something" he promised to do might involve tearing bits off him. Lionel summarizes -- this presumes that what was once a lecher has transformed into a lonely lovestruck guy with a limp and a lisp. When he wanted to go after him the man was a psycho who was probably armed and now Nails is after him and he's become a figure of pathos. Jean thinks she might have overreacted -- she has no idea what they've let loose out there. Lionel tells her to call him off then, but Jean says that she can't do that. Lionel tells her that Nails will probably bring his head back in a basket. Jean hits him. He gets out of bed. She asks where he's going. Probably to make a complete and utter fool of himself, he says.
Lionel walks out the front door and shouts to Jean to go back to bed. 
Jean follows and says that she's coming with him and that's that. 
He doesn't want her to come. She tells him it is not his street. He gives in and tells her to come on. They start walking down the dark street. Judith and Sandy approach from the opposite direction. Judith is whistling. She thinks she hears footsteps. They feel better knowing that Nails is around somewhere, but are confused about what Jean and Lionel are doing out. Lionel is motioning something to them, but they don't know what he's doing. They pass and Lionel says "Good evening." 
They say "good evening" and continue on. Lionel sees a hooded figure approach and when he goes towards him the person turns and begins to run. He ends up smack in the middle of Nails waiting arms. Lionel joins Nails in holding the man. Jean hollers not to hurt him. "He's a child," Jean says. Everyone stands looking at the boy.
Jean and Lionel walk into the kitchen where Sandy and Judith are having something to eat. 
Judith says that Sandy is feeling sorry for the boy now. Seems he's fifteen years old and still at school. Sandy says that he must have bought the flowers with his pocket money. In retrospect, she says that they should have just let Lionel take care of it in the first place. 
They compare him to an old lion who is protecting his herd. His pride, he corrects her, and the word takes on a double meaning. Judith takes the jar of pickled onions from the cabinet and asks if anyone wants some. Sandy tries to open the jar, but it's a bit stiff at first. Lionel smiles. With a little effort she manages to unscrew the top. Sandy is surprised by their reactions. She wonders what's wrong. "Nothing," says Lionel. As usual, Jean laughs at him.